And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize