I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Maybe he injected his testicle?
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
