Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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