all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Randomize