i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize