who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize