Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
