the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
you made out with another girl for some wings
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
