I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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