So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
