Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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