the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Randomize