But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
