Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
