I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize