he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
