even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
is that a dick in a sweater?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
