It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
