I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
