Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
