apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Randomize