It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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