Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
