Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
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