I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize