i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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