Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize