If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
