miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Terrible idea I love it
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
