Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Naked Twister starts at high noon
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
