so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Randomize
