This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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