Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
