everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
