you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
She told me I should be a condom model.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
