***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
So vagazzling was a success
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
