I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
