Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
