Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
