singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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