I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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