Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
