oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
