singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
