when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
