he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
this is an emotional support booty call
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
