I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
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