I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
