So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
