i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
this will be a night to untag.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
